Do You Really Understand What You Are Signing Up For In Relationship? - Dpsychologist

There is something worth discussing about how some men approach relationships. A man meets a woman he likes, becomes attracted to her, starts pursuing her and gradually begins spending money to impress her. <br><br>Before long, he is paying for dates, buying gifts, sending upkeep, settling bills and sometimes taking responsibility for expenses that have very little to do with him.<br><br>The interesting part is that he may be the one doing all the chasing. He is begging for attention, competing with other men and stretching his finances to prove that he is serious. Yet, he may not have established whether the woman genuinely wants a relationship with him or simply enjoys the benefits that come with his attention.<br><br>In Nigeria, this can become particularly complicated because some people enter relationships with expectations that were never openly discussed. <br><br>A man may assume he is building towards marriage, while the woman sees him as someone who should make her life more comfortable. He thinks his financial sacrifices demonstrate love, while she considers them the minimum requirement for keeping her interested.<br><br>The problem becomes worse when a man starts financing a lifestyle he cannot afford. His savings suffer, his personal goals are postponed and his financial responsibilities at home may be neglected. Meanwhile, he may have little understanding of the woman's financial situation, spending habits, relationship expectations or commitment to exclusivity.<br><br>There is also the uncomfortable issue of divided attention. Some people maintain relationships while secretly entertaining other romantic partners, including men who provide additional financial support. <br><br>A boyfriend may believe he is in an exclusive relationship while his partner is receiving money, gifts or intimacy from someone else. This is not behaviour exclusive to women, but it is a real possibility people should not ignore when discussing trust and commitment.<br><br>However, let us be fair. A woman receiving financial support from her boyfriend does not automatically make her exploitative. A man earning more may reasonably contribute more, and relationships will not always involve equal financial contributions. The real issue is whether both people are honest, respectful, committed and willing to contribute meaningfully to the relationship.<br><br>HERE IS THE LESSON :<br><br>Do not confuse spending money with building a relationship. Do not assume that because you are financially responsible for someone, they are emotionally committed to you. Do not use money to compete for affection, and never take on responsibilities simply because you are afraid of losing someone's attention.<br><br>A girlfriend is not automatically your financial dependent. Equally, a boyfriend is not merely a source of money. Both people should be bringing something meaningful into the relationship, whether financial support, emotional stability, loyalty, care, encouragement or genuine partnership.<br><br>Before you become desperate to have someone in your life, understand the kind of person you are inviting into it.<br><br> ARE YOU ACTUALLY BUILDING A RELATIONSHIP, OR ARE YOU SOMETIMES PAYING FOR THE PRIVILEGE OF HAVING SOMEONE AROUND?